DIMENSION POPPING PONIES
by royslady51
Summary: Broneyicida Hay-fever and Time Lords don't mix well. Every time a Gallifreyan victim sneezes, a different one of his bodies appears, has just long enough to realize what's happening and then turns into a small horse. It's not Dr. Whooves...it's better. SIX OR MORE DOCTORS PRESENT IN THIS STORY!
1. Stalled

If you don't like creative, original adventures that are most certainly NOT CANON, you might want to avoid anything I write.

**ADULT THEMES LIKELY IN LATER CHAPTERS, RATING WILL BE ADJUSTED AS NEEDED **

_**CURSING INVOLVED IN SOME AREAS.**_

* * *

A/N; THIS is the bunny that bit me after _**chapter 34 **__**of Scarlett Phlame's **__**Dear Whovian Authors. At chapter 113 **_several more Doctors volunteered as well. Bronicida is a word of my own creation and is pronounced BRONEY - CEE- DA. It was important to have the word 'broney' in there somewhere...but because I was bitten by one of the rabbits lurking around Scarlett, I'm hoping the Doctors will comment on this one...it's all their fault anyway cuz I'm pretty sure that one of them bred that bunny and just turned it loose!

* * *

**DIMENSION POPPING PONIES**

* * *

Rose Tyler stared into the large box stall where she'd quarantined the new equine species she'd bought as pet sized ponies on Riaca 4 yesterday, when she'd got home the night before...and saw several _ill_, feverish and annoyed men in there instead. What shocked Rose, was that she _knew _two of them on sight.

"Doctor? Where are my ponies? And what are you doing...how'd you get here, why aren't you in the TARDIS and _**is there a reason you couldn't be bothered to let me know you were just fine?" **_She had the stall door open and the last words were right in Nine's face and very loud.

Next to Nine, Ten winced, touched her arm and said, "_Let him be_. If **_I_** hadn't gotten Bronicida Hay-fever, he'd still be in his afterlife universe. Along with these other bodies. Warning you now, periodically, I'm going to be on hooves, some of me. Maybe we'll take turns, dunno. It takes a long time to get over, this kind of Hay-fever."

"So..._how_ did..."

"You bought us. From a _pet store _on Parteiat Six yesterday. Which shouldn't be possible, all things considered. And as far as we know, the TARDIS is scattered about, right where we each parked our her." Nine said wearily. "My you is in mine...so. _Need_ to get back, me."

"So...the reason the Dimension hopper fried on reentry is..."

"Because you were hauling _me _instead of just five real _miniature_ ponies. All of me, all my bodies before me and three after me, in fact. And three of me were resisting the transmat." Ten flushed_. "Sorry."_

"Not the older ones of _me _though, me and the next four mes, we all knew you and were _trying_ to stabilize it." Nine smiled. "Eight and Five trusted us older ones and tried to help, Seven had to knock Six clean _out_ to do that. _Contrary_, that me."

"But I wasn't anywhere near Parteiat Six!" She protested. "I got you on Riaca 4, in _this _Dimension. _Here_, not out there somewhere...I use it as a _space_ hopper too, see. _I was just shopping_." She told the two she knew, prompting a quiet 'Fuck!' from one of the hims she didn't know. Tenth let out a string of curses that had several of him flushed red in embarrassment.

* * *

Rose slumped to the thick straw between Nine and Ten. "Better get you up to the house soon. Good thing for you that Pete put me in the Mother in Law house instead of the main one. We'll have some privacy while we figure out what comes next. I wish I could say 'sorry' and mean it, but damn it...once the hopper is fixed I can get you back to the TARDIS...and locating the right 'you' isn't a problem now...so..._yeah_."

"Ten, how _did_ you lose Rose?" Nine's tone wasn't the friendliest she'd ever heard, so she simply got in his way. He couldn't punch his next body without punching _her_. He glared at her for a moment, then sighed.

"Raise your arm."

He looked askance at her but raised his arm, only to find her ducking under it to cuddle against his side. He lowered his arm and brought it around her back, holding her firmly against his side, dropped a kiss to the top of her head and then brought his other arm around as well to card his fingers gently through her hair. She sighed happily making him smile indulgently.

The other hims raised an eyebrow, each, at his wordless acceptance of a snuggle request, though they _did_ calm down at that point.

"Look, all this chitchat is very nice...and it's _also_ nice that I apparently both know _and_ trust you, which is considerably better than _some_ situations I've been in, _but what the hell is going on?" _A blond man in an eye-blinding coat of many, _many _bright colors snapped. "_Where_ is my TARDIS?"

"Where Ten parked her before the hay-fever hit." Nine drawled. "That's not where we _are_ though."

"No. We're not in _our_ universe just now." Ten confirmed. "Where's Handy?"

Pain covered Rose's features and she looked away, burying her face into Nine's chest and refusing to look at Ten now.

"Rose? _What happened?" _ Tenth's voice was urgent. "What's wrong?"

"You didn't make it. When the TARDIS left you just...faded away. Nothing but dust in the ocean breeze. Just..._gone_. I don't want to talk about it."

"What's she talking about, _we _didn't make it?" Nine growled now, pulling her up and onto his lap and not liking her shivering in the least. He shushed her as he tucked her head under his chin and cradled her close to himself. The younger selves watched in unabashed disbelief, not only at the fact that they were apparently coddling her but that Ten apparently agreed with the behavior.

"I had a part-human metacrisis." Ten told himselves quietly. "He was still mostly Time Lord, but he only had one heart and he was aging like a human. But still, he was ME, couldn't stay in our home universe, not both of us...so...I gave him to Rose. I thought he would've aged _with_ her. Apparently _our _age caught up with him instead." He looked at Nine, eyes full of tears.

_"Damn it._ Part human or not he wasn't a _pet_." Was all Nine said and pulled Rose in tight. "Look, we get back to our universe and we can wait at UNIT. We'll fix her hopper so she can go get one of the TARDIS' and tell her where we are so the other hers can go fetch us, since by that time the rest of us will be back in the past where we should be. Probably..._what Rose?"_

She had groaned at the word 'probably'. "You used the 'p' word...you _Jinxed it."_

Nine paused, sighed and groaned himself...all of himselves.

* * *

"Look, there was one point where I spend a day or three with Eight, and you picked me up later. I'll just go right back to Eight. He walked back to that yous' TARDIS but she was parked ten blocks away so if we figure to drop me with that you, just about a block away from where my you had _just_ picked me up," She pointed at Ten, "We can intercept Eight cuz _that_ you knows _which_ you to give me back to _and that you can figure out when on his own_...cuz it's just a matter of dates at that point. And Eight at least, is better at pinpointing a date...and an address. He's also a lot easier to get along with, what with all that empathy...and he snuggles almost as good as you do." She told Nine, looking up at him from where her head still lay on his chest.

"Almost?"

"Shorter arms."

"Ah." Nine grinned and just tightened his longer ones around his precious Rose.

Six started to open his mouth and closed it as he received a glare from Rose. "Watch it." She warned. These older yous, told me all about Sixth you...and your mouth. Behave or I'll introduce you to _mum_ while she's still ticked off at this you...right after you met her the first time," Rose pointed at top of Nine's short cropped head, "And let _her_ put some manners into you.._.her way_." Rose wagged a finger at Sixth. "_Behave_."

Sixth paused, watched both Nine _and_ Ten pale, then reach for their cheeks: He decided not to push it.

* * *

"Wise choice." Nine murmured. "Her mum will _not_ hesitate to slap us so hard there _is_ some danger of regeneration from the impact."

"True, very true." Ten agreed. "On the other hand, she did let me sleep of the regeneration from you at her flat. She adopted you, you know, sort of, once she'd had that chat with you. Decided we needed a mum and told me flat out that means all of us...the lot of us, are son in laws to her via Rose."

"Mums discipline their sons..." Nine groused. "Well hell, at least she cares enough to do it, I guess."

"Jackie Tyler, mother in law. Well, she's gonna slap us _anyway_, so we may as well get something out of it."

"That sounds...very..._domestic_, lads." A youngster with a fifty foot scarf grinned.

"Rose is worth it. She's the _right _one, to be domestic with." Ten told them. "Be nice and you'll probably get snuggled too."

"Why would she do that? She doesn't know us." Seventh scoffed.

"You're me. That's all she needs to know...and they are all Me, Rose. Every man in this...stall." Nine confirmed.

"Okay." She looked around at the others. "Baby Doctors, some of them are _adorable_." She was looking at Five, who was beet red.

"Oi!" Came a voice she knew from under a pile of straw. It moved revealing an additional Doctor. "Can't a man get some sleep when he's sick...I mean, really, mes." He paused at the scowls he was getting from Ten and Nine, spotted the mop of blonde tresses atop the head of a pink clad human female and knew...just knew that there was only one person Nine would cradle so tenderly.

"Rose? Is that you? How'd you _get_ here?"

* * *

"Yeah, it's me. And you 're actually in Pete's World. Look, can any of you walk?"

"Yeah, we all can, actually. At least we're past the pony phase...she bought us at the pet store while we were reduced to pony brains..." Sixth informed 11th of what had a happened and the plan Rose had made to get them back where they belonged.

"Well, her plans usually work. She's better at planning." Eleven smiled at his pink and yellow human affectionately.

"Has to be, she's really extra powerfully jeopardy friendly, our Rose." Nine told them, grinning as he told on her.

Ten nodded. "If there's a way to get into trouble and it doesn't find her itself..." He confirmed.

"Then she'll decide she's waited long enough _and go looking for it."_ Eleven sighed. "Her ideas for acceptable levels of trouble need two or more of me to get her clear of...and has the trouble finding abilities of at least sixteen or seventeen Jos or ten Aces." She told the others. All of those who'd known Jo groaned, though Seven and Eight began to _swear_. "And she outmatches Ace without explosives or anything sharp."

Seven and Eight just increased the creativity of their chosen swearwords and cussed _louder_.

* * *

"OI!" Rose protested. "Only cuz I haveta get _you_ out of whatever mess you're in the middle of! I'm good at looking after you, aren't I?"

"Yeah, you are. You _absolutely_ are." Nine soothed. "Took on an entire Dalek fleet and _won_."

"_Twice_." Ten told him. "With an army of cybermen thrown in for good measure. All she wants is our safety, nothing else _matters_ to her."

Sixth and the other 'infants' were gaping. "That's..._incredible_." Four stuttered.

"Yeah. So if we want to go domestic with _this_ little pink and yellow human, and I do, actually, _we've got cause_." Ten told them firmly.

Eleven nodded. "She's earned her place. Before she even saw the TARDIS, she'd already saved us once."

"True, I save her and she returned the favor...hadn't even seen the TARDIS from the outside yet, never mind inside. She loves us, lads...and she proves it, several times. She's a great deal more than a companion or assistant." Nine told them. "Soulmate, that's our Rose."

"And she won't hesitate to accept all of me. The ones she's met, the ones she's meeting now and the ones she hasn't yet...doesn't matter to her in the slightest which me it is with her...she _gets_ it, see. Never answers questions she knows you shouldn't ask. So she can actually be with any me." Eleven moved to the others who knew Rose _well_, forming a triangle around her and reaching out to tickle her foot after removing her left shoe.

"Well, in _that_ case...we can't leave her here. Had the metacrisis survived, that would be one thing, but we can't just leave her here without us." Five stated firmly. "And I think I can speak for the rest of you when I say I want my turn with her."

"We solved the stars issue already..." Ten was looking sadly at the back of Rose's head. "So..."

"Trying to get home. Wasn't anyone to babysit, and I'd done it already so I knew how. Just a last shopping trip before launch."

"Ah." He reached over to run a hand through her hair. "Poor little darling. I really screwed up, didn't I?"

"It's okay." She sighed, finally moving away from Nine, taking back her shoe, putting it on and then getting to her feet. She went to the open stall door and waited while they got to their own feet and followed after her.

* * *

"No, it's not. Not at _all_, not even close, actually." Ten disagreed, holding the stable door open for the others. "But it _will_ be. I don't know who told River my name, but from me being here I can assume it _wasn't_ me. Which means it was probably _you_, Rose Tyler. Cuz, you are smart and sneaky enough to do that." He let the door shut after the last of him was past and followed the line up to Rose's home.

Eleven raised his head like a hound scenting prey. "I haven't married River yet. Now, I don't have to, because Ten is correct...Rose is smart and sneaky enough to do that." He told himself as she opened the front door and held it for the Doctor's many parts to enter.

"She doesn't have to _know_ it's a name, just give it to her as a...password. Does the job, doesn't it. 'Course, you're gonna have to tell me what it is, first, for that to work, don't you?" She told the eldest of him, as she entered behind them, closing the door.

"Been hoping for this for while now..." She ran her fingers over Nine's jaw, then through 11th's hair. "Which one...or really, why settle for one. You're _**all** _mine."

"Yeah. Yeah, we _are_." Ten answered hoarsely, from across the room.

* * *

"Anyone hungry? For people food...instead of cracked corn and rolled oats..."

""Well, yes. It would." Eleven nodded, continuing the conversation instead of replying to the comment about eating livestock feed. "Yes, sneaky, smart and _overprotective _as hell, is our Rose."Yes. Yes it does mean that I'll have to tell you first."

"A chorus of "AYE!" answered her food inquiry, making it hard to hear him. She managed though, poking his side with a finger, "Which by the way, for such _little_ things you lot sure ate a _lot _of last night." She teased, enjoying their expressions.

"Could've kept that last bit to yourself, Rose." Nine grumbled.

She casually ran an arm around the waist of one of his past lives that had not yet spoken, an old, old man with a cane. "Come along then, Doctor. Let's get some food in you and I'll set you close to the heating vent." She ignored the scowl he handed her as she put him in a very comfortable chair, nearest as promised, the heat. "You stay right there. I'll bring you an almost proper breakfast."

_"Almost?"_

"Yeah. No potatoes. This universe doesn't have any." There was a sadness in her eyes at this pronouncement before she brightened a bit. "But it has other, very good things and I've tried to adjust to the lack of chips in my life. That hasn't been easy...love chips I do."

"Aye, she does. _Poor Rose_, stuck here without potatoes." Nine sighed. "But, you'll be in home London soon enough...and once we've got you on one of the TARDIS', she'll have some for you."

"Not your's. You said you already had younger me. Pardon if I take what time I have with you here. Love all of you, but I could wish next you had more of a set, y'know? Needs to grow a pair, that you."

* * *

_**"OI!"**_ Ten yelled, offended. "I can _adjust _that, you know!"

She crossed her arms and just looked at him. "Best get _that_ started then, so we can make adjustments before the shite hits the fan and we're all, the lot of us, _busy_."

Nine stared at her. "Break down in some areas of the design, I suppose."

"Somethin' like that, yeah." She did glare a bit at Nine then. "If you were gonna design next you _for me,_ why'd you tone down the testosterone..._I love your testosterone levels_."

"Ah." First groaned. "Too much information, my dear."

"So, lock it up for later." Six sniped. "She's our _bonded_, First...she has the right to ask us to adjust some of our hormone levels."

"True, very true." Third smiled, giving Rose a light hug. "Though it's not often a bonded wants that particular one _raised_."

"Used to be human, _now_...I'm something else, but yes, the higher level is preferred. I like you as _deeply _male...see? Not...maybe yes, maybe no _or maybe only sometimes_."

"_Oi_..." Ten groused. "M'not _that_ bad."

"Yes, you _are_." Eleven disagreed. "Remember being that you, after all."

"Pretty _boy_." Nine nodded. "I get it. Sorry about that, Rose."

_**"OI"!**_

"Pretty doesn't have to mean _feminine_, does it? Although, really, I think my _mum_ had a bigger set than..." Rose broke off what she was about to say, knowing how Nine was likely to react. She was right, suddenly there were subtle improvements in Ten's 'design'. "Oh good, thank you." She told Nine, grabbing both ears and hauling him down for a reward kiss. A nice wet one. "Been wanting to do that since that whole Dalek thing. I won't, though, so I'd appreciate it if you _did_."

"Rose..."

"It's just a _tiny_ rewrite, Nine...but we would be a lot more stable." Eleven told him quietly. "Do it _before_ you regenerate, please."

"Seriously."

_**"Yeah."**_ Ten and Eleven chorused.

"I'll..._think_ about it."

* * *

****TBC****


	2. Incredible

Summary: The Doctor...all of him...learns that repairing the hopper isn't needed.

* * *

'Incredible' Doesn't Cover It

* * *

"Everyone done?" Rose asked as the meal came to an end.

There were nods all around as the many bits of the Doctor pushed their plates aside and just looked at her, Nine, Ten and Eleven were frowning.

"Rose?" Ten prodded. "What's going on that you're not telling me?"

"Um."

"Rose..." Nine started.

"Sorta has to do with the events on Sat Five and there's way, _way _too many babies in here."

"Oi!" Fifth muttered.

"So, with that in mind, I think the TARDIS tampered, cuz it's been six hundred years for me...here." Idly, with the part of her that wasn't waiting for an explosion, she listened to his various sounds of startlement. "While it's true that this _was _the mother in law's house and _is _shielded well enough for your presences to evade detection, the main house hasn't been lived in for over four hundred...in fact, there's no house there anymore. It's all pasture."

"And the source of the shields?" Tenth asked in a tense tone.

"The fully adult result of that crystal...minus the bits she that didn't bother growing because I couldn't use them..._alone_. Though she's got two command centers...one for each Vortex, y'know? One powers off, the other will power on...so do we really _have _to use the hopper or can we just _**go**_? If you want know anything else, Nine can Look and pass it on. Okay? That's fair, the rest of you older ones can get it from him, whole and entire. I'll just sit and amuse myself thinking about your bums and he can take a tour."

"Yeah. Yeah, that will work fine." Her grumpy one told her with one of those silly little smiles she adored, as he reached for her temples.

"What did you name her?" Eleventh asked softly, an enchanted expression on his face.

"Beauty, cuz she is. And I'm guessing she's probably installing those missing bits right now. She has them, just not where Rose going to trip over them." Nine answered as he absorbed the information. "She's an absolute darling, that one."

Fourth interrupted then. "What are you talking about?"

"His clone was mostly Time Lord, so the TARDIS gave him a crystal. There's some stuff that happened and you know better than to ask, yeah? Specially with so many of your older yous standing right here...let's just say I got a good look as sommat I shouldn't've...though it did prove the answer to a pest control problem..." She paused as Nine roared with laughter.

"Is _that _what we're callin' Daleks, these days?"

"Anyway, he didn't have, pardon the expression, Time enough to check me and that one didn't bother," She jerked a thumb at Nine and Ten in sequence. "I don't age no more and there's odd things that's new. _She grew for me_."

Eleven gave her a tight hug. "Well, let's see if she's got a console then, since there's plenty of drivers _now_."

"Yeah, that's sorta the _scary _part...you're all very, very _bad _drivers. Told her that if she wants she can reabsorb it and just drive herself."

Every version of the Doctor bellowed "OI!"

* * *

She leaned against Nine for most of the trip. She couldn't keep him and she _knew _that...but she kept the close contact as long as she could. What she _didn't_ do was get anywhere near Ten. When Nine was busy she put one of the other selves between herself and Ten...until Five finally asked her why.

"He abandoned me, another guy and the TARDIS when he didn't have a way back or even know the name of the place where we were. And he abandoned me three times total. If Eleven doesn't mind, I will go with him. He's a lot more stable than your Tenth and I won't give Ten another shot at me. I know it's after the Library, so should be safe enough." She tilted her head to the side and up at the lanky figure on her other side.

"I don't mind." She felt his arm go around her waist and saw Ten stare. She ignored him and just buried her face in his next body's chest.

"Ya know Ten, it's a damned good thing she knows about things that change from body to body, she's right. I wasn't at all stable when I was you. Four times was it, first Mickey, then a few times after that. And it is past the point when I wouldn't have been _able_ to say yes...so yes, Rose Tyler will be coming with me."

"Besides, she's got a lot to learn from mama." Rose murmured. "She's not as big as a Sexy...doesn't need to be cuz I'm not the pack-rat you are." She told 11th quietly. "But the wardrobe room is easily four times the size of her mother's. I collect clothes and accessories, shoes, handbags, hats, wallets, backpacks...for any gender...I've even got a fez collection in there...over four hundred. No two quite exactly the same."

"Fezes? _I love fezes!_"

"And over eight thousand _different_ bowties."

"You've been..._planning_, haven't you?"

"Shows, does it? _Yeah_. We met when the stars started going out, yeah? I wanted to stay with this you, then. Couldn't. Wouldn't let me."

* * *

Not ten minutes after they got the double consoled ship back to one of the older TARDIS', all of them turned back into ponies. Beauty parked herself a bit later in one of her mother's gardens, in the version of the TARDIS that belonged to 11th. She kept most of them in little stalls with a french door on one side that opened into a bedroom...and only the bedroom had a door to the corridor. 11 she took to bed with her and Nine..she asked beauty to find his version of her mother. 'My younger self will be half out of her mind with worry.'

* * *

Keeping a careful distance from one another, the two Roses transferred Nine to his TARDIS and the younger Rose's care. "Don't leave the TARDIS at all...ask her to remove the outer door until he's well. Ask her to refuel herself, turn on the exterior cameras and speakers and all that, no outer door, okay? Guaranteed nothing gets in if there's no door, right? Get her to take herself into the vortex and stay there after she's fueled. She made sure her younger self had pony pants so he wouldn't poop or whatever, on the TARDIS' floors.

"I don't remember any of this and Ten said that Nine is a retirement version." Elder Rose told her younger self after a long talk. It was time to wind it up and move on. "That means you don't have leave and neither does he. You two enjoy each other. You're lucky, you get to _keep _that one. He's the best of the bodies you know? The very best of the lot. _And I miss him every day. _You tell him I said that I'm okay, I'm with 11th and I'll be with the next and however many more there is...and that I'm gonna outlive him. Might outlive Jack...but I'll _never _stop missing this him."

"What happened to us?"

"You know better than to ask that: He's trained us better than that, by now." Elder Rose scolded and returned to her ship without another word, the last of them gone, except Eleven. Younger Rose watched her elder disappear while holding an increasingly heavy mini-horse in her arms.

* * *

She barely made it to the jumpseat and put him down before she had a nearly naked Time Lord on her hands. She ignored it and he didn't seem to notice. She told him what her elder self had asked her to.

"That's just for this you. She just...wanted you to know. She wanted _me _to know that...I will never, ever stop loving you...and that with this form of you, I never have to lose you. But I hurt for that me. I can't imagine not having this you there...with me. It's..._inconceivable_." She gave a full body shudder at the thought and he found himself catching her up. "I just love you...so fucking much." She whispered into his neck.

"Not sure I trust my next body with her."

"She's not with him. She went with the one after. I think your next body did some very painful things to me...and that while that me still adores him because he's you, she can't trust him. So she went to an elder she _could _trust. She said that the one _after _the one after you 'reset' the cycle of lives. So you've...um...got a lot more, I guess."

"Reset? Started over? Yeah, lots more. But _this you _is the part of _her _that never could quite let go of _this _me. A big part but it sounds like there was enough for two. Never wanted me to be without my Rose, I'm guessing that's part of what Bad Wolf did. But I don't know why she wanted Ten to grow a pair...I mean, if she wasn't going to stay with that me, why adjust his testosterone levels?"

"_Grow a pair_...when a human says that, it's like calling him _spineless_, you know."

"_Is it?_ Regeneration's a lottery...well, that's why she went to the one after."

He was steering her down the hall to their rooms and he drew her into his with him. As the door closed behind the pair, an offended male voice yelled, **_"Wait...why am I wearing pony pants?"_**

* * *

****TBC****


End file.
